after_alex

Today was supposed to be the start of a new adventure. I’ve been enrolled in a two-month study program in Vietnam to study…yes, Vietnamese. But wait, this is advanced VIetnamese so don’t write me off already.

But despite getting worked up about the program and making plans on the next few days…down to details of what I’m going to do when I land (party it up with my brother Tony), travel plans have fallen through. I was scheduled to make it to Vietnam through a roundabout flight itinerary that starts in LA, swings by San Francisco, lays over in Hong Kong…and then finally lands in Ho Chi Minh City (aka Saigon). After labouring all night on packing and getting to LAX airport hours early…the fucking flight was late, and of course this threw off all my other plans to connect to Hong Kong and Vietnam.

Thus, after sitting at LAX in the lobby for 3 hours, and then on the tarmac for over an hour (fog at SFO prevented us from going on time — FOG! WTF?!)…we got to SFO, and a shitload of us passengers piled out and scrambled to our connecting flights. Most of us didn’t make it in time. Tokyo, Hong Kong, Beijing…we were mostly screwed. Our alternatives? Wait until tomorrow…sigh. Basically all the flights to Asia had taken off by 2 pm and so we were done.

After all that hassle all I get is a pink coupon to a dumpy hotel near SFO…and upon recognizing how hard I was getting fucked by United Airlines I kinda lost my cool at the United ticket counter. Like the passenger for whom you both feel pity and embarrassment, I was that guy…yelling at the poor ticket lady and slamming my hands on the counter. “I paid $1300 to get stranded in SF? WTF! and you want me to pay for my own hotel room?!” Seriously not Kosher. I suppose I made enough commotion (over 1 hour)…to draw the supervisor over only to get the usual bullshit from customer service “No sir…there’s nothing we can do….no sir, I don’t have the authority to help you…” blah blah. Buncha douchebags. I ask myself why I even chose United over the other airlines…even with their stupid connection through SF to go to Saigon, out of all places.

Nevertheless, it’s time to make an opportunity out of a challenge, and I’m back in SF enjoying a nice cup of coffee at a quaint little cafe called Le Boulangerie (de Hayes Valley). Very cool place. After just being here a few hours I feel like I’m home again. Like I was never supposed to leave. It’s the way people carry themselves along the street…the gentle yet true faces on the buildings overhanging San Francisco’s streets. And the imagination that people just put into local cafe that makes this place just so familiar.

Furthermore, it doesn’t hurt that SF is a sort of place where I know lots of people. In an emergency stop like this it’s important to find some companionship and sensible conversation (instead of airplane and airport banter) before I go crazy. In a way, SF is a great crossroads of humanity. In just a few minutes, my friend Kelly will be down from her apartment to explain the latest madness in her life…and later I’ll see my god-sister Liz for dinner and her cousins from the UK. That’s nice. Hmm.. do I even want to leave and head to Vietnam?

One adventure to the next. I suppose the life lesson here is to be flexible, and make the most of what life throws at you. Even with someone like myself who’s pretty relaxed about life’s surprises. Even then I need a reminder once in a while.

I guess that it has taken me a while to come to this point…where I am finally at terms with being back in the US, and where I have finally re-constructed “my life.” Some people are quite good at adjusting to life back and forth from Afghanistan, but I’d say that for most like myself, the jolt of settling down can be a spin. Intentionally, however, I’ve spent the past month-and-half in Southern California in order to reclaim some of my roots and recognize what’s important for me in the future.

Last time I made my way back to the US (in 2005) after a stint in Afghanistan, I was totally culture-shocked.

This time, I was surprisingly culture-shocked again. Upon returning to the US, I rushed to my cousin’s wedding in San Jose, California. And after just 1-night of sleep I was in the middle of it — a traditional Vietnamese wedding ceremony in the suburban environs of California. I recall just staring out the window at the local park, just thinking, “man….are those kids lucky to be just rolling around at park.” Typically, kids in Kabul are working for their parents by the time they’re old enough to walk and talk. Whether they’re in the welding shop, herding goats (even on the streets of Kabul), scavenging the neighborhood trash, or just fetching drinking water from the local pump….life isn’t so simple. Still it’s kiddie-life, and I’m sure most kids look upon their younger years with yearning … no matter where they were spent.

Culture shock was accentuated this time, not just by the East/West | Islam/Christianity | Pork/Chicken divide…but by the huge chasm in technology. Being a former high-tech researcher and software manager, coming back to a world where information flies was just…IS just….amazing. Astounding. Day-by-day we can’t understand the eventual leaps in technology that we make, but with things like the new iPhone I have been simply blown away. I knew that I had to catch with almost 2 lost years of “hi-tech” so I signed up for the iPhone as fast as I could. Man…was that the right thing — and most shocking thing — to do. With this iPhone I’ve wasted away hours-days-nights (…or finally caught up with tech, depending which way you look at it)….hacking, jailbreaking, apping, and breaking this thing.

On coming back to the US, I thought that I would be able to pull out my old desktop PC and begin tinkering productively on it again…then I put my iPhone next to it…and WTF. Sure, I can put Linux on the ol’ white box and slap a bunch of cool programs on it. But pretty much the iPhone can do everything you want it to — if you are just patient enough with it. And now I’m convinced that “cloud computing” is here. To hell with it, I said. So today I dumped my beloved old white box over at Salvation Army, along with the huge 17″ Samsung Monitor that I dropped hard-earned cash on (back in 2001 of course). With my re-education with technology at least I’ve found some peace.

More importantly, however, I realize now why I wanted to spend so much time here in SoCal before moving on. California is a great place not just because it represents technology, but because it’s the home of comfort, trendy lifestyle, and great ideas. I’ve been able to do some hard meditation on “what next”…which is typically an easy deliberation for me. This time it’s different, because I feel that the US isn’t what I’ve wanted to come home to…and it’s not the core of my future…but because it’s just the platform. In reality, coming back was originally my finale for Afghanistan. No more, no less.

Now I’ve come to terms with the next few years of school at Harvard and Penn…(more on this later). Somewhere in there I’ve also found some bearing with regard to career vis-a-vis family, life aspirations, and reality’s limitations. In the years to come, it’ll be important for me to stay humble and imaginative while keeping it real. Life is at a crossroads, I suppose. And it’s an exciting time. Like my old friend Thien said, “The end of every era is the beginning of the next.” You can choose “when” you will be alive, but it’s all about choosing where and how.